LifeSavor!

This poem was first published on Faithwriters on Jan 15, 2007.

"Your poetry has saved your life
From the pain of your childhood strife.
Suicide you may have committed,
If to this writing form you had not submitted."

I did not always understand my friend’s poems,
Her vocabulary oft as unfamiliar as Jeroboam’s.
Yet, I understood what her therapist meant,
Writing is therapy when you use it to lament.

Too many siblings for comprehension,
Didn’t leave time for personal attention.
Only one thing I could do right,
If I wrote a poem, they’d think I’m bright.

Sharing negative feelings didn’t fair well,
So on paper, my pains I learned to tell.
But if someone discovered my journal,
My life at home became infernal.

So my poem topics turned to worse
As I learned to journal in verse.
Though my message may be tragic,
They would like it, ‘cuz poetry was magic.

I made it through hard times,
By writing simple rhymes.
Mourning when my grandpa died,
A poem of memories while I cried.

I got through life with an alcoholic,
By writing poems that were symbolic,
Or straight-forward and to the point.
Whatever way my pain I could disjoint.

Eventually my poems gave way,
To a Friend who was here to stay.
By my side through think and thin,
He died on the cross because of my sin.

My pains I no longer need to hide,
Their sword also pierced His side.
My writing took a long vacation
While I learned about salvation.

Now I feel called to create,
And this call cannot wait.
Whether it a poem or story,
I need to write it for His glory.

Thanks for the Stew

Knowing that my busy day was going to make it hard to get dinner on the table and still get my husband and sons to their respective places on time, I put a couple of venison roasts in the crockpot before leaving for work in the morning. When I got home that afternoon, I had less than half an hour before I needed to be out the door. I used part of that time to add carrots and potatoes to the now fully cooked venison. When I got home from running my youngest son to church camp, I thickened the stew and let it sit a few minutes until Paul got home.

My reasoning for making stew was convenience. I felt somewhat silly making stew in the middle of the summer, but I knew it was all I would have time to make. My oldest son thanked me several times last night and today for making venison stew.

This made me ponder if I take the time to really notice and be thankful for all the wonderful gifts that I am given. Do I take for granted the sunshine and rain that God sends my way? Do I fully realize how blessed my life is and take the time to thank God for those blessings?

I got tired of Gregory thanking me for making stew. Well, maybe not really tired of it, but definately thought it was a little overboard. It was, after all, only dinner. I know that God does not get tired of us thanking Him for the "little" things that He does in our lives. Will you join me in thanking Him today for EVERY blessing He sends?

My Strict Diet

A writer asked a group of writers if we worked on a writing schedule, setting aside certain times when we wrote, similar to having office hours. I have tried this once or twice. It’s hard for me to do.

One writer answered, “I follow a very strict writing schedule – and then I wake up.”

This describes me in both my writing and my attempts to diet. I do a great job sticking to a writing schedule or a diet – until I wake up and stop dreaming. I know I really should stick to both, but that falls under self-discipline, an area in which I still need work.

Missing Ingredients

The other day I posted that I made a strawberry custard pie. It was very yummy, even though I messed it up. As I copied over the recipe, I realized that I had forgotten to put the milk in the custard part of the pie. It still tasted like custard, but that part was very thin and heavy.

This is not the first time I have done this. The first time I made Hawaiian bread, I forgot the eggs. Like the pie, no one would have known the difference if I had not told them my mistake.

We all make mistakes that lead to better ways of doing things and new ideas. But some mistakes have consequences and are more likely to be the ones that we hide. No matter how much we try to hide them, they are not hidden. The consequences are worse when we hide the missing ingredients in our mistakes.

I have made Hawaiian bread with the eggs, although Gregory says he likes it better without. The next time I make Strawberry Custard Pie, I will remember the milk. And I will try to correct and admit the mistakes I make in life.

Crawling all the Way

My son found a tidbit in a travel brochure about Hugh Glass. It seems in 1823, Glass was part of a hunting trip to the Black Hills and tangled with a mother grizzly protecting her cubs. The leader of the trip left two men in charge to do what they could and to bury him when he died. Glass woke up to find himself deserted without any weapons, left to die.

Some accounts say the Glass crawled approximately 190 miles to, Fort Kiowa, the nearest settlement on the Missouri River, north of present day Chamberlain, SD. Other accounts say he crawled 100 miles to the Cheyenne River and built a raft that he then rode to the Missouri River. Either way, he showed up at Fort Kiowa more than 2 months later.

Two lessons in this story are opposite sides of the same coin. The men left in charge of taking care of Glass when he died gave up too soon. They didn’t bury him when he died; they left him to die assuming that was the only possible outcome of his condition. Glass, on the other hand, did not give up even under the most impossible of conditions.

I tend to fall under the first category. When I don’t get things accomplished as quickly as I think I should, I decide that the task is too big, or impossible. Perhaps remembering the determination of Hugh Glass will encourage me to stay on task and finish the big job.

Creative Juices

Last month my sister and nephews were in town and we ate together at Perkins. My sister had a piece of pie that sounded delicious, but I didn’t try it. I typically order a pie that I will never make myself – like French Silk or Key Lime. This pie was a strawberry pie with a layer of custard in the bottom.

Today, I decided to try making a similar pie. I found a recipe for custard pie, cut the ingredients in half and baked it in a larger pie pan than the full recipe requested. I then took my normal strawberry pie and put that on top of the custard.

I do not see myself as a creative person. My biggest hindrance to creativity seems to be coming up with original ideas. Solomon tells us in Ecclesiastes 1:9 “What has been will be again, what has been done will be done again; there is nothing new under the sun.” Perhaps I don’t need original ideas, just less common ones.

Despite my lack of creativity, I enjoy doing creative things; crafts, writing, sewing. It gives me a glimpse into God’s creativity and makes me even more in awe of all that He has created. That itself is worth the effort.

Here is the recipe I created today by combining the two recipes.

Strawberry Custard Pie

2 eggs
5 ½ Tbls sugar
1 2/3 c milk
½ tsp vanilla
¼ tsp salt
1/8 tsp nutmeg

Preheat oven to 450. Beat egg slightly. Add remaining ingredients and stir. Put pie crust in pan and place in oven. Pour mixture into pie shell. Bake 20 minutes. Poke with toothpick halfway between center and edge. If comes out clean, take out pie, if not reduce heat to 350 and cook until toothpick comes out clean.

1-2 pints strawberries, enough to fill remaining of pie shell
1 c sugar
1 c hot water
3 Tbls cornstarch
3 Tbls strawberry gelatin

Cook the sugar, hot water and cornstarch until thickened. Add gelatin. Cool and pour over strawberries in pie shell. Top with whipped cream.

Leftovers vs Tithing

I use to be able to get several meals out of leftovers. I would cook a whole chicken and use the leftovers to make chicken ala king. The leftover chicken ala king would then go into chicken pot pie for yet another meal. Now when I cook a whole chicken, the leftovers get made into sandwiches and chicken melts without leaving enough for chicken ala king. When I do have enough leftover chicken to make this family favorite, the leftovers are rare and never enough for pot pie.

My attitude towards giving to God use to be the same as my attitude towards chicken for two of our favorite meals – use what is left over. As the offering plate was passed, I would look in my purse and see what was there, using that to determine if and how much I gave. Sometimes I would give $5, sometimes $20. Often, I did not have any money to give at all.

God does not ask us for leftovers. He asks for the first fruits of our labor. In 1997, I made a New Year’s Resolution to start tithing and to pay off the credit card. Paul said I couldn’t do both, where would we get the extra money to pay off the credit card if we starting “spending” more of his paycheck by tithing? I knew that I was being convicted that we needed to do this, so I stuck by my guns. In February, we received a bonus check that covered the balance on the credit card. That summer we put new carpet in the house without carrying the balance on the credit card. As Paul would say, it is amazing how much further 90% goes than 100%. God is faithful when we tithe.

Just as we now budget our tithe to come out before any other bills or expenses, I also cook chicken for the sole purpose of making chicken a la king or chicken pot pie. My family likes these meals enough to make them without leftovers. God deserves even more.