Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Am I Consistent?

I recently was involved in an online discussion about some of the false teachings that are seeping into our churches today. I honestly believe that God moved us from Minnesota to Ohio 12 years ago to get us out of a mega-church and into a small church where we could grow. We are living in a mega-church society. Many churches focus more on numbers than on honest conversions, some at the expense of the Gospel. What good does it do to gain the whole city for our church if their souls are still lost?

On Wednesday nights our church is doing The Truth Project put out by Focus on the Family. It is taught by Dr. Del Tackett and deals with society's worldview vs. a Biblical worldview. He quotes a study that says only 9% of Christians have a Biblical worldview even though most would say they do. It is no wonder that many of our churches are watering down the Gospel to draw in more numbers if our worldview is no different than that of the world.

So I ask myself, am I really one of the 9% or am I deceiving myself? I know that there are differences in how I live my life than how my average neighbor lives theirs, but do I really believe differently? As Dr. Tackett asks in the first lesson, “Do I really believe that what I believe is really real?”

Last week’s video had an illustration that for me, was very convicting. Dr. Tackett works with men who struggle with pornography. Most of them tell him that their biggest struggle is when their wife and kids are gone, leaving them alone. Dr. Tackett asks them if they believe in the omnipresence of God. He then points out that their statement that they believe God is omnipresent contradicts their statement that they struggle most when they are alone. If God is omnipresent, then we are never alone.

This made me evaluate what areas of my life I live inconsistent with what I say I believe. Over the last year, even before hearing this illustration, I often needed to remind myself that God hears my every thought. If I truly believe this, it is easier to take every thought captive, but I needed to start consciously reminding myself that He hears every thought before I could take them captive.

I’m sure that are other areas of my life that are not 100% consistent with what I believe. I pray that God will show these areas to me. I look forward to seeing what else I learn during this study.

Saturday, January 12, 2008

Fear Factor

For Christmas I got two pets, Naomi and Simone. They are leopard geckos and insectivores. I have no problem picking up the lizards, or even the mealworms and wax worms they eat. But their main source of food is crickets and I cannot yet get myself to pick up a cricket. Instead I shake the crickets out of the jar into a Ziploc bag with vitamin or calcium supplement in it to dust them, and then let them crawl out of the bag into the lizards’ cage.

Okay, I know that the crickets are harmless. There is no way the cricket can hurt me. I’ve even eaten them before myself (already dead and covered in chocolate at a Cub Scout “Fear Factor” event), so why am I afraid to touch the crickets with my hands? When one got loose I picked it up before it could get away, so why not just do it when I feed Naomi and Simone?

My fear of touching the crickets is irrational. There is no basis for it; it is not even an overt fear. It simply is. And it is not the only irrational fear I have.

Four years ago, my son caught a garter snake in the yard and my husband told him he could keep it if he took care of it. We figured it would die the first winter. It didn’t and he still has it. I do not like the snake. When he takes the snake out of its cage, I stay in a different room if possible. I know that Bendy does not bite and he could not hurt me if he did. But I still do my best to avoid it. Over the last four years, I have had several nightmares about snakes. Yet, I know that a garter snake is harmless.

There are other fears in my life. Some have a rational and other don’t. Just as my fear of the crickets affects how I feed my geckos, most of these fears govern some area of my life. Most of the time, the effect is more significant than controlling the movement of an insect. My fear of failure prevents me from trying new things. My fear of rejection limits how easily I let someone get to know me.

Yet God tells us not to fear. It was the angels’ words whenever they appear; to Mary, to Joseph, to the shepherds. God told Joshua seven times to “Be strong and courageous” (Deut 31:6, 7, 23; Joshua 1:6, 7, 9, 18) In Romans 8:15, Paul reminds us that we “did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, ‘Abba, Father.’”

They say in recovery circles that the first step to recovery is admitting the problem. If I admit that my actions are motivated by fear and that God says not to fear because He is with me, this is the first step to not letting my fears govern my actions. Rejection by other people seems less important when I focus on God’s acceptance of me. Remembering that God will not let me fail at doing what is in His Will for my life helps me to step out in faith to do new things. I’ll let you know when I reach my hand in the cricket jar to feed Naomi and Simone.

Thursday, January 10, 2008

A Prejudice Against Pride

I tend to be a very prideful person. It comes from being a descendant of Adam and Eve. I do not always let that pride show in my actions and attitudes, but it is there. It is there when I decide that I am going to eat the extra snack that I know I shouldn’t eat. It is there when I decide that I am going to take that last box of whatever off the grocery store shelf even though it is obvious that someone else is shopping for the same item. It is there when I decide that I am going to spend an hour reading instead of doing housework. And most assuredly, it is there when I decide to ignore God.

Oh, I often convince myself that I am not choosing to ignore God, I simply do so unintentionally. Yet, I am still ignoring Him and that is a choice. A choice motivated by pride. One of the many places that God warns us about pride comes from a teenage girl blessed beyond her wildest imagination and still humble in her reaction.

“His mercy extends to those who fear Him,
from generation to generation.
He has performed mighty deeds with his arm;
He has scattered those who are proud in their inmost thoughts.
He has brought down rulers from their thrones,
but has lifted up the humble.” (Luke 1:50-52 NIV)

These words were part of the celebration that Mary had with her relative Elizabeth after learning that she would be the mother of God’s Son. She had been chosen because of her humility, and her humility stayed in tact throughout the ordeal. Mary does not point out that God has lifted up the humble as a way of false humility, but as praise to God for what He has done for her and was doing in her. Through humility, God extended His mercy towards her.

The most convicting part of Mary’s song is the reminder that God knows when we are proud in our inmost thoughts. See, that is often the only place that my pride can be seen. But it is still there. That is what false pride is – our inner-most thoughts of pride surfacing as humility.
It is my desire and my goal this year to seek God in all that I do, to eliminate pride in my innermost thoughts by focusing on God and not on myself. This blog will show my heart. A heart that hopefully will become more and more pure as I become more and more like my Savior.